30 Days of Letters
I’m going to do this. Sorry, guys, but I want to write more often.
I’m going to do this too. Part of the reason I made a Tumblr was so I could write more. I’m not doing enough of it. Some of these are gonna be TOUGH, but here it goes.
Here’s the list from the above “Read More” link.
- Day 1 — Your Best Friend
- Day 2 — Your Crush
- Day 3 — Your parents
- Day 4 — Your sibling (or closest relative)
- Day 5 — Your dreams
- Day 6 — A stranger
- Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush
- Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend
- Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet
- Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to
- Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to
- Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain
- Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you
- Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from
- Day 15 — The person you miss the most
- Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country
- Day 17 — Someone from your childhood
- Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be
- Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad
- Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest
- Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression
- Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to
- Day 23 — The last person you kissed
- Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory
- Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times
- Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to
- Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day
- Day 28 — Someone that changed your life
- Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to
- Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror
(Source: chaplinnn)
Day 1 - Your Best Friends
There’s 3 of you. So in no particular order…
First off. You are a huge asshole. And this is a joke, but you probably have a huge asshole too. I’ve known you the longest, and it’s been the most volatile friendship I’ve ever had. I honestly can’t remember when we became friends or how we got to be such good friends so quickly. All I know is it feels like you’ve always been there. I’m really glad that we made it through those breaks in our friendship, even though you never told me the reason for one of them. We might annoy the shit out of each other sometimes, and I might want to kill you, but I wouldn’t give up our friendship for anything in the world. Not again. You were sick when I started writing this, but you’re better already. It was probably the tea I gave you. We don’t have time to be sick!
Next. You are probably the most creatively random person I have ever met. You’re absolutely ridiculous. You’ve always been there with sound advice whenever I needed it. I wish you could be as level headed with your own problems. Sometimes you make me want to resort to violence, whether you deliberately mock me with butchered words or are a fucking pain in the ass in an argument. But I can never stay mad at you <3<3<3. I thought you were done with your coops? Where the hell did all these pennies come from? We’ve lived together for the longest time, and I’m really sad that’s going to be ending soon.
And last but not least. You’re undefinable. I feel like we know each other the best, but also the least. You can make me feel the best or the worst. I wish I always knew where we stood. I often over think things between us because I don’t know what’s going on in your head. When we hang out it’s always the best. It could be quiet or loud, long or short and I’ll still enjoy it. You always ask me what I’m thinking. You’re the only one I text on the regular.
Without you three, individually and together, I don’t know where I’d be. I don’t even want to think about it. You’re more than my friends, you’re my family. From the bottom of my heart, I love you all. If we end up living near each other I would be the happiest man alive.
Day 2 - Your Crush
I don’t think the word “crush” applies to anyone for me, but the closest thing to my “crush” would be you.
I don’t really know what to say. I’ve already told you how I feel. From what I can tell, it had/has somewhat of an effect on you. At one point in time you had a crush on me, which was so, so surprising. In some ways, it still is.
I’ve thought about giving up on you many, many times. But I can’t. Even when you’ve pretty much told me it’s not gonna happen. I can’t help but think that there is still a chance, and when it comes I’ll take it.
I tend to tread lightly around this because you are near and dear to me, and I don’t want to fuck that up. Sometimes I might get a little bold and do certain things, and it feels good. Who knew? And sometimes I want to go further, but I have to stop myself, because we are “just friends”. You have no idea how much I fight myself over you.
Up to this point in writing I haven’t really been too positive. So… You can raise my spirits just by being within view. I could stare at you for hours. Even though I can’t say I like everything about you, the things I don’t like never stay on my mind. I replay memories again and again in my head. I would do some outrageous things just for you to kiss me and not hold back. I want you so much it’s not funny.
You’re much more than just a “crush”…
Day 3 - Your Parents
Mommy. Daddy. 22 years old and I still call you by those names. We don’t speak much, mostly because I completely suck at keeping in touch. I’ll call this weekend so we can catch up.
You’re the only parents I’ve ever had, and I think you did a pretty good job of raising me. I’d like to think I have morals and a good head on my shoulders, and that’s partially because of your influence. Thanks for giving me chores and beginning to teach me how to cook; I’ve seen people who can’t do anything for themselves. Thanks for letting me drive without a license. Thanks for providing for me, even now, when I need your help. Thanks for doing what you thought was best for me, because it led me to where I am today.
Nobody is perfect. And this is not a shot at you, you weren’t bad parents, but I want to be a better parent when my time comes. You’ve given me many years to observe your parenting, and I saw the good as well as bad. I want to take the good and make it better if I can. I want to take the bad and overcome it as best I can. I want to do the things for my children that you didn’t or couldn’t. And it is only by your example that I am able to know what I want to do.
Thank you for being my parents. I love you, and I know you love me too.
Day 4 - Your Siblings
Rukiya
My oldest and wildest sibling. You’ve always been full of energy and life, so spontaneous, but also quick to anger. I think I know the reason for that last one, and I am so sorry you had that happen to you. I wish I had known sooner, I wish I could have done something to help. I can’t imagine how hard it must have been, and might still be, for you. But today you are a strong woman, regardless. All the way in Cali!
You gave me my first lesson on race and racism. I don’t think I understood it then, but I do now. We’ve had a few bonding experiences and even though I can’t remember them all, I know that you are my wonderful big sister and I’ll always be there for you. I’ve still got your camo hat, but I lost the tag.
Giselle
Gisbum! You’re probably the most independent out of all of us. From the time you left for college, you’ve never looked back. Now you’ve got a family of your own. I know you’re busy working and taking care of the kid, but I hope you have more of a social life than when I visited.
I remember asking you for a quarter at school so I could buy a lollipop from you. And trying to protect you by beating your guy friends with wet, twisted ties with Eric. I remember you teaching me how to shower. You gave me a sticker every time I did it by myself. Thanks.
Eric
What up, brah? Look at you. Family man. Wife and two kids. I’ve only seen them for less than two weeks. If I can I’ll definitely come visit this summer. I hope you’ve matured as well. Having a family so young sure does make you grow up fast. I hope you’ve started to speak up. How is it that I, the quiet one, speaks louder than you?
I remember when we didn’t get along, at all. Then all of a sudden we got pretty close the last couple years we were at home. I’m glad you were kept back another year. I don’t know how I would have survived without you there. And I’m still pissed you had sex in my bed! Mostly because I slept in it afterwards without knowing…
Jordan
Hey, little brother. I hope you’re doing well, being home alone with mom and dad. I hope you’ve made more friends that accept you as you are and don’t treat you like you’re beneath them. I hope you’re happy. I’m sorry for treating you the way I did when we were younger and I was still at home. It was a mix of jealousy for not being the baby anymore, immaturity of not understanding that you weren’t a normal little brother, and me thinking I was in a position of power over you because you were younger. I promise to treat you better than I have, how you deserve to be treated. I hope we can get along better.
I can’t believe you’re almost 18! It seems like time is passing so quickly. I hope you’ve been learning how to take care of yourself. If I come home this summer I’ll teach you something. Remember it!
I love you, guys! I’ll be in touch, I promise.
Day 5 - Your Dreams
When I Am Awake
Do you exist? I don’t think about my future seriously enough or often enough to be familiar with you. Well, I guess I do have some dreams now that I think about it. There’s the career. I’d like to work for a small company, doing something in web design/development. I still have to figure out where exactly I want to focus. Then there’s the family. Hopefully there’s a wife and kids in my future. I haven’t exactly started down that path yet…
If there’s anything I do want, it’s to be around my friends when college is done with. It’s not such a big thing, but could be pretty difficult. I do know I would give up a higher paying job for it. I find happiness in simple things, and being around my friends is probably the thing that gives me the most of it. I don’t need things like the sun and the moon.
When I Am Asleep
Some of you came to me many times. Climbing up the ladder to a slide, only to jump off and fall for a long time. Running very slowly around a track towards an airport hangar while being chased by a Tyrannosaurus Rex. Being able to fly but not fully in control of it. Sometimes they are really weird, or realistic, or semi-fantasy. Once I was one in group of kittens captured by a mad scientist. Another time I was fighting Dragon Ball Z bodies with Looney Tune heads in my backyard. I haven’t had any nightmares in a long time. Or at least none that I can remember. I recently found out that some people dream in bright colors. Dreams, y u no colorful?!
Day 7: Your Ex-Girlfriends
It’s funny, I don’t really know what to say. To either of you. I gotta think about it…
………
……………..
Well. Actively thinking about you both has brought things I could say to mind. But I don’t see a point to saying much of it. You know? What’s done is done, and I’m moving forward. I hope you’ve done the same.
Funny story though. You probably both know, or did know, that you came close to meeting each other. I think it might have bad at the time, but right now I think the memory would be hilarious.
Day 8 - Your Favorite Internet Friend
The closest thing I have to internet friends are those here on Tumblr with whom I have mutual follow-ship. Sooooo……
You are cool as shit! Seriously. You might be an “old”, as you like to say, but I’d gladly hang out with you over some people my age. Even though we’ve never met. If I ever get over to New England I’ll definitely try to meet you.
I think the reason I like you so much is because you give me hope that I don’t have to conform to society to be a real adult. I can just be myself. And if anybody doesn’t like it, fuck ‘em.
I am so far behind on my 30 Days of Letters. There are 17 drafts waiting, some of which I haven’t even started yet. Some are pretty hard, some keep coming back to the same person, and for others the person I’m supposed to be writing to does not exist. :/
Day 9 - Someone You Wish You Could Meet
When I think of you, no name or face comes to mind. I don’t think you exist.
Day 10 - Someone You Don’t Talk To As Much As You’d Like To
Why don’t we talk more? I know part of it is because of my own lack of remembrance of you when I have free time. But communication is a two-way street.
I’ve let a lot of friendships fizzle and die because I didn’t stay in touch. I don’t want that to happen with you, so I promise to put in the effort. Hopefully it’ll cause you to do the same.